Overreacting?

hcs_mom · #1 03-12-2004, 06:33 AM

OK--I'm trying to figure out if I it's just that I didn't like this nurse from the minute she came through the door or if I should really be upset...

We ended up with a new nurse Wed night. From the minute she walked in the door, it was, "I'm so tired". Hannah is sick, but we caught it early, so she is already starting to feel better and getting her to bottle feed has been challenging, but she will do it. I warned the nurse that she would have to work with her. I stepped out of the room and come back in to find Hannah in her bed on the boppy pillow (we use it to elevate her AFTER feeds!) with this nurse trying to FEED her. I asked her to please take Hannah out of bed and feed her, that is what she is used to. She complained about too many wires (there are 2--her O2 line and the pulse ox).

So, I stay up until nearly 1:30 b/c I am watching this woman. When I go in around 6:45, I find a FULL bottle (from her 3 AM feed) and a nearly full bottle (she'd taken about 10 ccs) for her 6 am feed and Hannah is...you guessed it, IN THE BOPPY PILLOW! I got her out of bed and she GUZZLED about 2 oz in 15 mins! So, from 12am-6am, she's had less than 2 oz of milk until I go in there.

Then last night, my husband and I had a mishap with Hannah's meds and managed to soak the gauze under her trach, so we pull it out and see SOMETHING under there. So, we nearly stand Hannah on her head so that it doesn't travel through the stoma and find that it is a small piece of velcro from Hannah's trach ties. (The nurses cut them some so that the velcro on the back closure does not irritate her skin).

For the most part, the nurses they provide have been very good, but I've had to call the agency about 2 of them. I don't want them to think I'm overreacting and emotional, but I think everything that happened Wed. night was unacceptable. Should I call them or just let it go?

Jennie

cariaad · #2 03-12-2004, 07:08 AM

Call NOW! I wouldnt want this nurse in my house! Deb

Ann · #3 03-12-2004, 07:26 AM

I don't think you are overreacting at all. Â*A lazy night nurse is not a good sign and if she's not allowing you to get the rest you need when she's there or she's make more work for you when she leaves, then she's getting paid for NOT doing her job. Â*Also, don't worry about complaining about the nurses to the agency, most likely, you aren't the first or the last to complain about that particular nurse. Â*I hope you can get a good night nurse into your house soon. Â*

Ann

Laurie · #4 03-12-2004, 08:56 AM

If they are not following your explicit directions in caring for Hannah (such as "do not feed her in the bed&quot

, and are making errors in her trach care, I think it is very reasonable to ask for another nurse. You don't even need a reason - just stating that you are not comfortable with this nurse is sufficient.

indiemum · #5 03-12-2004, 10:37 AM

I am on a crappy nursing rampage right now. I did not use my best professional judgement with one and she is lazy, careless and takes advantage of us and I am too "afraid" to do anything about it. Don't be like me, call.......perhaps this is the only wake up call this nurse is going to get.

Kelly

christyw · #6 03-12-2004, 08:32 PM

I understand your frustrations as well. I wasn't real big on calling the agency...but that was just me. However, there were a couple of intances that really took me over the edge and I HAD to call. A nurse just NOT FEEDING a baby is rediculous, negligent, and she just was not wanting to do her job at all. So, she doesn't need to be paid! I don't think you should let her come back unless you can really come to an agreement with her that her behavior was unprofessional that evening and she needs to get it together. Still, you don't owe her that, but I'm just saying it's something you COULD do.

I'm sorry you're having to deal with this, or that any of us have had to deal with it. We just need a little REST....we'll all go insane if we have no help, and then our help comes and drives us insane as well!

Good luck in whatever you decide.

Oh - and by the way - it's likely that the agency may cause you to FEEL like you have overreacted. They start coddling the situation, making it seem all sugary...covering up the negative...etc... this is common. I've been brought to my end many times, only to have someone from the nursing agency or from Apria Healthcare make me feel like I've just overreacted and nothing is that bad. They love to diffuse the situation and help you to forget all about it - and to feel bad for getting upset. YOU HAVE A RIGHT to expect EXCELLENT care for your child. Not a nurse that complains about her inability to get her own self some sleep! You shouldn't have to deal with this...you have a right to be mad...don't let them make you feel otherwise. One negligent thing leads to another and then it's just a really bad situation. They should realize that.

christy

Barb · #7 03-12-2004, 09:02 PM

I'm fairly new to all of this, but one thing I have learned is to WRITE out every single thing that went wrong. Look over the list in the light of day (and after sleep). Decide if it is bad. THEN do something about it. I am currently going through a situation with an unresponsive specialist and if I didn't have each and every phone call and communication documented, I could very easily feel like I am over-reacting. But I am not and I have the e-mails and phone logs to prove it.
In your situation, don't forget, this is FOR PROFIT for these companies!!!! They are not doing nursing care as a personal favor!!!! They are making money from you!!!!! They need to provide competent care for that payment.
You need to tell them each and every problem, not just how you "feel." I HATE more than anything being told how I "feel"!!! Just tell them exactly, and in a litany, each and every bad thing that actually happened. And then tell them why it is bad for your daughter. And then, if they blow you off, tell them that you are calling the NICU caseworker about the issue (they get their referrals from the NICU . . . I know our NICU caseworker would be absolutely horrified to hear what you just wrote! She couldn't fix the problem, but she would think twice about sending them more patients). And, switch agencies!!
Anyway . . . I could go on. Obviously, you have struck a nerve!! Good luck with this. Just call the agency and be calm and collected. You are NOT overreacting at all!!

-Barb

Evy · #8 03-15-2004, 12:07 PM

This is a topic very near to all our hearts. Writing everything down is a very good idea and I think something we may start to do. My daughter has had ongoing nursing issues and is in the process of making the decision to either keep her daytime nurse or try to find another one (another problem not easily solved). We both communicate with the agency regularly. I try not to have a complaint every time (I'll call for the schedule etc.) but I do not hesitate to back up a complaint that my daughter has. Even if she calls, I will call too if it's important enough to us. That is one key, if it's important to you, don't hesitate to call. These children are medically fragile and a glitch in competent care can go wrong quickly so we have to protect them. Many of our issues with this daytime nurse come from her personality - ie, she does not greet people when they come or go, etc., but there again, if you can't be comfortable in your own home that isn't good for anyone in the family. This is a good place to vent nursing frustrations! More later, I'm sure.